Crazy Rick’s Survival Guide to the Language of Women

Now I don't claim to be an expert on the ladies, but I know a thing or two that might be true. And buddy, if you're gonna survive love and relationships without ending up on the couch (or worse, outside with the dog), then you might wanna pay attention to how women really communicate.

See, women are masters of emotional expression — but not always in plain English. So here’s Crazy Rick’s handy little decoder guide to help you stay one step ahead.

1. When she says “I’m fine”: She wants you to ask again and genuinely listen. That ain’t “fine,” son. That’s emotional Morse code.
2. When she gets silent: She’s not just chillin’. She’s overthinking about what’s bothering her. It’s like a tornado brewing in still air.
3. When she looks away: She’s not bored. She’s hiding her emotions. Something’s up — and it’s probably your fault.
4. When she asks too many questions: She’s not interrogating you — she’s seeking reassurance. Show up. Don’t clam up.
5. When she argues with you: That means she cares. Deeply. The day she stops arguing? That’s when you really got a problem.
6. When she seeks your attention: She wants love, not validation. Give her your heart, not just a thumbs-up.
7. When she cries in front of you: That ain’t weakness — that’s trust. She’s letting you in. Don’t mess it up with “you okay?”
8. When she holds your hand tightly: That’s her silently saying, “Don’t let me go.” And you better not, pal.

So there it is — your first crash course in Women’s Language, Rick-style. Listen up, pay attention, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll make it through with your dignity intact... and your relationship stronger for it.

— Crazy Rick